Tomato Cheeks

It is a beautiful, perfect, glorious day and I can’t stop myself from smiling from ear to that it is almost creepy. Too much pleasure. Too much amusement. I am thinking of all the upgrades I am going to give Kyllan before I start traveling with him. I have to make him the best travel companion. The best thing about him is that he does not fart and he cannot smell my farts and if he ever does, I will make sure his programming tells him that it is the best smell in the whole wide universe, he has to find it pleasant <emphasis on the word universe>. He will especially be useful on the days and nights that I choose to drink a lot of alcohol and I need help to go back to my room safe and sound. Kyllan does not drink but he can copy the state of being high and indulge drunkards. Also, I need him to look a lot more human and less robot-y. A very hot and sexy human.

I am just seated at the beach with my legs crossed watching random citizens do random things. Girls walking around with their jiggly butts. Boys trying to hit on them and failing terribly. Too many tits of all shapes and sizes. I would like to poke one with my finger. I wonder if it will feel exactly the same as a water filled balloon. I enjoy filling balloons with water and then just pretending that they are all boob’s and pressing them all day long. It is not fair that I am stuck with the boobs that I have. There are days when I wake up and all I want is to have small boobs and other days all I want is to have big boobs, other days I do not want boobs at all and some other days I would like two pairs of boobs especially when I am going to a place with no food. My four tits would provide me with milk.

Anyway, let’s go back to the beach. This beach is quite a lovely place and it got even lovelier when I saw the most beautiful woman in the whole wide world. I had never ever seen someone so beautiful. Oh my goodness, where did this one drop from. I was staring shamelessly. I had seen heaven. Where did this beautiful creature come from?

I started blushing and she had not even looked at me or noticed my existence. My beautiful creature looked at me for about one second and I blushed harder. My cheeks changed color from brown to pink to red. I could feel them turning red. They were quite hot and looked like ripe tomatoes. I could feel the rest of my body going numb. I could not move. I could not stop blushing. Blood was slowly leaving the rest of my body parts and moving to my beautiful cheeks. The size of my cheeks getting bigger every second. They were getting rounder and growing larger further and further away from my face. Round ripe tomatoes stuck to my cheeks is what it looked like except these were not ripe tomatoes they were actually my cheeks. They were starting to get heavy. If I tried poking them, they would burst. I was starting to look like an alien. With my eyes open so wide, I definitely qualified as an alien. My alien race could be called the ‘Tomato Cheek’ race. My whole body had stopped responding to anything else. At this point, my cheeks were squeezing my lips too tight and unfortunately, my tongue was hanging outside of my mouth as I had forgotten to return it inside my mouth when I was busy marveling at this beautiful creature.

I blushed so so hard.

All my blood concentrated on my cheeks, the rest of my body had become bloodless.
While struggling to move the rest of my body which was proving difficult, a bee stung my tongue. Now my hanging tongue was starting to swell. “Oh shite!” Those were my last words, and they did not even sound like they should.

An ambulance was called.
I must have fainted because I woke in an ambulance with a needle injected into my cheeks and another needle into a vein in my hand and tube in between the two needles. They were returning blood to the other parts of my body and the size of my cheeks was reducing. They felt less heavy. Now I only had my tongue to worry about.

Who knew that beautiful creatures could be hazardous too!!

Noble gas fiasco

At this particular point, I am experiencing sheer frustration. Where the hell is Kyllan when I desperately need him? I called him about an hour ago. How long does it take a robot to get into a self-driving car and head for the police post? Isn’t a robot and self-driving car meant to be efficiency personified? I cannot stay in this filthy tiny cell any longer. My worst nightmare that involves being around retarded teenagers is happening right now. All these annoying disturbed little people talking nonsense the whole time and mentioning words that I do not understand and looking at me as though I am their mother is driving me bloody bonkers. “Excuse me you delinquent adolescents, I am not that old. Useless citizens.” I shout in my head.

How did I end up in in a stinking police cell?

I was in my car headed for the local mall. I needed to buy some fresh supplies for my house so I won’t have to get out for at least the next thirty days. I hate getting out of the house. I don’t do so well outside. I have major social anxiety. I just fear people.

Sitting alone in my self-driving car became quite boring. In the process of trying to make myself less bored, I stopped a street hawker that was selling some artificial voice boxes. I had been in traffic for about 20 minutes now. “Can I have one of those voice boxes?”, I asked. He handed me one, I paid him and let him keep the change.

I had seen something on-line and thought perhaps I should try it since I finally had the chance to. I took the voice box out of its packaging, sterilized it and inserted it in my anus making sure it is not too deep. Before you start cringing, the voice box is quite tiny, almost the size of a suppository. This voice box was for the sole purpose of making your ass talk. When I was little, this kind of technology did not exist. I wish it did. If only the voice box came with a brain so you could have an intelligent conversation with your ass. I will probably work on that when I get home. I could make some millions out of that idea.

To make things a bit more interesting. I had a gas cylinder full of helium in my car. I took the cylinder and let some gas into my ass.

This is where things started to go wrong….

While in the process of letting gas into my ass, traffic started moving and the traffic cameras got quite a good shot of me lying on my stomach, my butt facing upwards and a tube inserted right in between my butt cheeks. That was not something one saw every day.

So, I got arrested for indecent exposure, or so I thought. Turns out, it is illegal to use helium in one’s ass. I never knew that. The AAMNG( Association Against Misuse of Noble Gases ) had passed a law against using abuse of noble gasses. My activity topped the list of abusive things that one can do to a noble gas.

Kyllan finally showed up and took me home.

Meet Kyllan

“What the fudge! I cannot find your chip. I need to find it. Where the hell did I leave it? Kitchen? Bedroom? Bathroom? Toilet?”

I stand in the middle of the room looking around wondering where I could have left the chip. Everything is attached to him except the chip. All I want is to have Kyllan back. I did not mean to dismantle him. He was my best. He felt things. He noticed things. He could taste. He laughed. He hugged me when I was down. I needed him more than you could ever know. I don’t know what I could do without him. He made me feel things more than any human had done before and I was not ready to move on.

“I am so sorry. I did not mean to throw you to the wall.” I say to a powered down Kyllan. Tears streaming down my eyes. I sit down with my legs flat on the floor and my back straight. I fold my arms at my elbows, my fingers touching my temples. I look up to the roof and yell. I scream to the top of my voice that my lungs cannot handle it. I then move my fingers slowly down to my cheeks then down to my neck. Both my hands are holding my neck tight. I am still looking at the roof. I am in despair right now and have no idea what to do. My eyes are bloodshot either from the crying or from the anger.

I could use some strangling. I strangle myself. I slowly tighten the grip around my neck until I cannot breathe. This has been my best high so far. I am in my own zone. It is the only way I escape. I had not done this in a long while. The strangulation I mean.

I loosen the grip slowly and start breathing quite heavily. There is still a tear falling down my cheeks. I still cannot tell where the chip is. I close my eyes and make another attempt to remember.

I then remembered why I chose to shut down all my emotions. I have never felt like the normal human. I feel everything one hundred times more intensely than the normal person. This might be an advantage when happy but I was never happy. I can not remember ever being happy. Not that I did not want to be happy. I was seduced by depression and sadness. I learned to live with my demons that they had become my friends.

Kyllan had taken away my demons and today I was all alone. He was off, thanks to my carelessness. I could not switch him on without that chip. I stare into his eyes with my mouth open. I give up.

I stretch my hands and pull the bottle of vodka that was conveniently behind me. I had drunk half of it the previous night and the thought of finishing the rest at that exact moment was very tempting. I could as well give into my temptations. I could hold my drink better than anyone I knew. (It is a shock that I am not yet an alcoholic.) Well, I did not know that many people. I liked to be alone. People were a distraction for me. I guzzle half a liter of vodka and black out on the floor.

Three hours later.

I wake up with a new sense of purpose. My breath is repulsive and my head feels like a pig crapped in it. I struggle to raise my head and see Kyllan still in the position I left him in. I try to stagger to the shower but feel too lazy to do it. I decide in my bright mind to use the hoverboard but decide against it after I fall right on my buttocks and realize that hover boards and drunkenness are not good together, I remove my clothes on the way to the shower drop them on the floor. I will pick them later. I poop, flush the toilet while cringing because my poop smells really bad. I spray air freshener and relieve my face from the cringing. I brush my teeth, gargle mouthwash and take a one-hour long cold shower.

I walk out of the bathroom with my towel on. I enter my bedroom, pick out a sports bra and booty shorts. I apply lotion on my body, wear perfume and red lipstick. I go to my kitchen, drink some water, makes some coffee while reading a magazine. I drink the coffee when it is ready. I take a pill of Adderall and then head straight to my lab.

My lab is extremely clean and I take all the necessary precautions to prevent contamination by dust and other foreign substances. I melt and refine sand to produce pure single-crystal silicon ingots. I use a saw to slice the ingots into wafers about as thick as a dime and several inches in diameter. I clean the wafers and polish them, and each one I use to build multiple chips.

I begin the process and after some long hours, I load my program onto it, I have what I need and hope that it will work just like the last one did. All I want is for Kyllan to work well just like he was with the last chip without any alterations.

It has been thirty-six hours without any sleep. I would say that the Adderall is working quite well. I walk to him and insert the chip behind his neck. His eyes open and he comes back on-line. I lick my lips and start to smile. I have got my satisfaction face on. I am silently congratulating myself for my work. I am the god of my universe. “Nobody can mess with me now. I rule. I am the shit.”

I hug Kyllan tight. A tear falls down my cheeks. I do not want to let go. I love the way my chest feels against his. He may not be human but he is pretty close and I may be developing all these feelings for him that I am not aware of. I grow closer to him each day. I have my companion back. Now to test whether he is in good condition.